Still Alive

I think that was the longest break I've taken from blogging since I started, but my schedule has been so difficult that no other option was possible. Last week, I wrote more than 32,000 words, including two mid-sized projects and most of the last third of a book that is now (mostly) completed. Final edits will be coming back soon, but for the most part I never have to look at the thing again.

I've back on the 'ole freelancing train now, taking care of my PR work and looking at ads in an attempt to avoid the content mill work that pays most of the bills right now. Here's basically what freelance writing ads have to offer:

Generic Ads: We need people to write stuff! We need stuff written, and we need millions of people to write that stuff! If you know what stuff is and you can make words, you can write our stuff. We may or may not pay, we'll tell you after we find out after you sign up and fill out five contact information forms.

Laundry List Ads: We need everything in the world: Literally- whatever it is, we need it. We will sit on our backsides while you will run out business with little direction, writing everything and then marketing it through 225 different social bookmarking and networking sites. You must have a PhD. in douchebaggery and at least 17 years of experience. We don't pay much, but you will get a Zen satisfaction from working for us. Zen!

One Guy in a Million Ads: We need one person to write about purple squash that grow on one specific bank of the Amazon. If you have five years of experience in writing about that squash (the blue ones from the same bank don't count), feel free to send in at least 10 clips that are exclusively about that type of squash. There will be four levels of testing to determine your squash knowledge. Pay is $12 an hour.

Half-Assed Ads: We think we need something written, or maybe we need something else. We're not sure yet. We think that once we get started, maybe in a few weeks, there will likely be money coming in. This is an amazing opportunity! You can get in on the ground floor of whatever this turns out to be! We don't have any money, but if you create the content for our websites, then we will and we might pay you. Imagine the exposure!

In the meantime, I found this:

I write like
Vladimir Nabokov

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!